Articles by Dr. Kathleen Cairns

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LIFE GOES ON: Help For Bullies?

 HELP FOR BULLIES?  Victims are receiving a lot of attention lately. There is pending legislation to protect them from bullying in schools and online. It’s about time. I found the following statistics at the http://behavioral-management.com/bullying-statistics…




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LIFE GOES ON: How To Find Peace

HOW TO FIND PEACE Sadly, most of us are stressed, overworked, anxious, depressed, depleted of energy after long days of work and family obligations. This world it too fast for most of us. Addictions are…


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LIFE GOES ON: Get Amnesia

DEAR DOCTOR KATHLEEN, When I was a child, I was abused and neglected and lived in many foster homes. I am very good at taking care of others because I never want anyone to feel…



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LIFE GOES ON: You Can Be Happier

Honesty & Integrity If we have lived most of our lives in unhealthy relationships, most likely we’re not accustomed to living in honesty. We have lived in the denial of our own emotions, needs, and…


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LIFE GOES ON: Food & Mood

FOOD/MOOD CALENDAR I advise a very strong method of healing/feeling/dealing with life for all of those who want to ACT, NOT REACT, to YOUR mood. EVERYTHING YOU PUT INTO YOUR BODY IS A CHEMICAL. Food,…


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LIFE GOES ON: Dating Rules

It was a dark and stormy night. My patient, let’s call her Mary, went to a bar in an upscale restaurant, looking to meet a man. Divorced a few years ago, she felt ready to…



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LIFE GOES ON: Health, Not Age

HEALTH, NOT AGE As a psychologist, I often hear my patients talk about their fear of aging. Pretty, young girls see their first wrinkle and freak out. They talk about turning 30 as if it…


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LIFE GOES ON: Patient-Therapist Relationship

PATIENT-THERAPIST RELATIONSHIP Psychotherapy creates a very unique relationship based on confidentiality, trust, openness, and safety. As a psychologist, I am legally and ethically bound to secrecy of everything you tell me. (Exceptions are if you…


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LIFE GOES ON: Choice Not Need

CHOICE NOT NEED   Jung introduced the concept of Introverts and Extroverts. Often misunderstood, we tend to think of Introverts as being quiet and shy, and think of Extroverts as being the life of the…


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LIFE GOES ON: Sadness Not Madness

SADNESS NOT MADNESS Anger is contagious. An angry voice fills us with fear, stress, anxiety, and anger. It’s abrasive, unattractive, repellant, and we want to get away. Flight or fight. React with fear or aggression….


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LIFE GOES ON: Psych Meds

PSYCH MEDS Many psychological issues are not related to childhood trauma, abuse, neglect, or painful life events. Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD), Depression, Anxiety, Bipolar 1 & 2, Schizophrenia are examples of mental illness that may…


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LIFE GOES ON: The 3/4 Life Crisis

THE 3/4 LIFE CRISIS   We’ve all heard about the mid-life crisis. But there is also what I call THE ¾ LIFE CRISIS.   OK, so you’re 60+and starting to feel OLD. You may be…


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LIFE GOES ON: Not All Mothers Are Nice

Here’s the problem. It’s MOTHER’S DAY. Hallmark Card moments. Television commercials recommending hearts and flowers. Beautiful gifts. But, what if you don’t have a great relationship with your mother? What if your mother has abused/neglected/disappointed…



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LIFE GOES ON: What is CBT?

WHAT IS CBT? Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, CBT, is a method of psychotherapy that enables one to deal with negative feelings and behaviors by tackling issues that cause discomfort in daily life. Let me take you…