This may be stating the obvious, but things change and they often change in ways that we’d prefer they not. It’s raining today instead of snowing. I’d prefer snow, or at least not rain. Too bad. This is what we’ve got. CT Watchdog recently experienced unexpected and an unwanted virus. Things happen. Cars get in accidents, things break, dictators are overthrown, and a thousand million other things in every second.
If things are always changing and we’re not able to adapt ourselves to these changes friction arises — drag, resistance, and frustration are inevitable. This impermanence of things was called anicca by the Buddha, and it’s one of the “three marks of existence.” If we don’t understand these marks we are bound to be dissatisfied, anguished, or in downright misery.
It’s not just unexpected things that change. We are constantly changing. We are breathing in and out, we are exchanging molecules and atoms with our environment, we are moving, and thinking, and imagining. Nothing stands still (and if you can think of something let me know!). Even the universe is changing on a cosmological scale.
Trying to make something that is changing not change does not make sense but we do this all the time. Every time we complain about how things are, we’ve fallen into this trap. Things can always be otherwise. Consider this advice from the Emperor Hadrian (from Memoirs of Hadrian by Marguerite Yourcenar)
I determined to make the best of whatever situation I was in … Whatever I had I chose to have, obliging myself only to posses it totally, and to taste the experience to the full. Thus the most dreary tasks were accomplished with ease as long as I was willing to give myself to them. Whenever an object repelled me, I made it a subject of study; ingeniously compelling myself to extract from it a motive for enjoyment. If faced with something unforeseen or near cause for despair, like an ambush or a storm at sea, after all measures for the safety of other had been taken, I strove to welcome this hazard, to rejoice in whatever it brought me of the new and unexpected, and thus without shock the ambush or the tempest was incorporated into my plans, or my thoughts.
To learn more about how to live in the present moment and how to increase our connection to compassion read my books. I’m pleased to announce the publication of my latest, The Everything Buddhism Book. It’s an accessible yet comprehensive introduction to Buddhism with my practical, contemporary, and somtime irreverent perspectives.
Arnie’s books are available for order below and his free guided meditations are also available below.
For more information on mindfulness and additional guided practices, visit my website Exquisite Mind. The complete CD 1, CD2, CD3, and CD4 are now available for listening and download, free. Visit here for a guided breathing and body scan meditation; walking and standing and standing yoga, mindful yoga, and the mind scan and emptiness practices.
Arnie Kozak, Ph.D. is a clinical psychologist, meditation instructor, and author of Wild Chickens and Petty Tyrants: 108 Metaphors for Mindfulness(Wisdom, 2009) and Everything Buddhism (available on Amazon now). He also the founder of the Exquisite Mind in Burlington,Vermont and writes a daily blog entitled Mindfulness Matters: Tools for Living Now!You can practice mindfulness meditation with Arnie every Friday morning from 8:00 to 8:45 (EST) in the eMindful.com online classroom. To login into this free meditation, click here.
As an expert in stress reduction, wellness, and mindfulness, Arnie will present weekly practical wisdom for transforming stress. His award-winning writing will help you to lead a richer and happier life.
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