LIFE UNPLUGGED
For those of us on the east coast without electricity since Saturday October 30, life has focused on the pursuit of warmth, food, water, and safety. BUT MOSTLY, IT HAS BEEN A QUEST TO FIND CHARGING LOCATIONS FOR OUR TECHNOLOGY!
Every morning I go to Starbucks to plug in my surge protector to charge my iPhone, laptop, and Nook Book. I feel like I have a new office with new coworkers. There’s a long wooden table filled with laptops and cells belonging to students, professionals, retirees, and families. My grandmother would have laughed to see our frenzy to stay connected. “You have to charge your book??”
I am reminded of when I lived through the Northridge California 6.8 earthquake and the Rodney King riots when I lived in Los Angeles. As frightening and tragic as the experiences were, I was so grateful for the kindness of strangers. People bonded in their fear and posttraumatic stress. This week feels very similar. People are sharing surge protectors, chairs, and food! There were about 15 of us this morning, and when one man left to stand in the LONG line for a coffee refill, he asked us all if we needed anything. A simple gesture, but one I would not expect to see under normal circumstances. Churches, Senior Centers, Libraries, and places of business are opening their doors for warming and charging stations. New York Sports Club in West Hartford is open to the public for free showers until the power is restored! Very generous, and great PR!
Psychologically, the explanation is simple. The safer we feel, the less we think we need each other. When we experience danger and trauma and fear, we feel needy and realize that we actually do need each other, and our vulnerability allows us to reach out.
The giving and receiving is heartening. I wish we could always behave this way. Why can’t we feel connected to each other when “the living is easy”?
Maybe we can take something away from this. Can’t we continue to share tables, talk to strangers, check on our neighbors, let others go in front of us in traffic, tip extra, and go to bed earlier? (SO many of my patients this week said they felt so much more rested as they were going to bed so early.) No TV, computers, cells, emails, iPods, tablets, books, music, lights, heat.
It has felt like we’ve temporarily gone back to another century where humans were more connected to each other because they had to be. Life naturally followed the sun and the moon, light and dark, warm and cold.
How ironic that we are more kind, connected, and giving without the technology that is supposed to create connectivity.
LIFE GOES ON©
Kathleen Cairns, Psy.D. is a licensed clinical psychologist in private practice in West Hartford, Connecticut. She works with adults, adolescents, and couples. You may call her at 860-236-5555 to make an appointment. She is the author of “The Psychotherapy Workbook.” You may email her at kathleen.cairns@mac.com and she will try to answer as many of your questions as possible.
www.kathleencairns.com
Life goes on… and every day matters…
